Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Woof.

I have often compared having a toddler to having a dog.  The two have lots in common:
  • They understand you but often don't obey.
  • They don't speak English.
  • They run.  Everywhere.
  • They give you the puppy dog eyes when they want something.
  • They're messy, especially when eating.
  • They demand a lot of attention at inconvenient times.
  • They like to roll around in the grass and dirt.
  • They love you no matter what and are happily excited to see you come home.
  • They eat really weird and not-good things.
  • They mooch food from everyone around them.
  • They whine a lot.
  • They make lots of noise.
In fact, now that I think about it, at least dogs are house broken, which is one up on certain toddlers I know.

Anyways, when I was a teenager we had a Labrador-doberman mix dog named Nikki.  (She was a used-dog when got her so we didn't get to name her.  I can think of a ton of better dog names: Velcro, Zipper, Emerson, Rufus, etc., but we got Nikki.)  Nikki was a typical dog in that she was brilliantly stupid: in some ways she really out-smarted us, but on the whole she was an idiot.

Nikki didn't always wear a bow, but this was the first digital picture I found of her.  Fun fact: since I don't have any sisters she was my "bridesmaid" at my wedding reception.  A bridesmaid that mooched off of all the guests all evening and peed in the corner of the yard.

Nikki had a bad habit of getting food off of the counter and eating it.  Well, really, my mom had a bad habit of leaving the food on the counter.  I'm not sure why she ever thought that Nikki couldn't get the food, because Nikki almost always did.  She (Nikki, not my mom) was infamous for one time eating a whole gallon-sized bag of Muddy Buddies (also, appropriately enough, known as Puppy Chow) which had been left on the counter.  She was happy and sick all at once.

Today I remembered this episode when I came into the kitchen and discovered this:

See those muffins on the counter?  And see what Cole has in his hand?  Apparently I left the plate of muffins too close to the edge of the counter and Cole just couldn't resist.  He was terribly pleased with himself and gobbled the muffin down before I could take it away.  I wasn't going to take it away, I just wanted to get him to the table before he got more crumbs all over my floor.  (This was moot anyway, since there were already muffin crumbs all over the floor.)

Once he was finished I realized he had a pretty pungent diaper, which made me laugh because Nikki wasn't exactly known for her pleasant dog-odor.


Woof.

2 comments:

The Short Family said...

So entirely true. I have always thought that too.

ElRay M Roper said...

briliantly stupid. Perfect description for Nikki. Could sense the cheese door in the fridge being opened from the back bedroom.