Distraction Tactics

Cole is becoming the king of distraction tactics.  Three examples from today:

1. Cole spit up all over the kitchen floor this morning.  (I think he still has a bit of the reflux.)  Infant spit up: not exactly cute, but not really all that gross to momma.  Big monster baby spit up: gross.  Especially when they start playing in it.  I quickly cleaned him up and then set him down so I could clean it up.  He immediately shot off for the door to the garage, which was slightly open.  Withing 2.3 seconds he proceeded to open and crawl right out of the door and into the mysterious unknowns of the garage.  

I had been going in and out of that door all morning, each time having to drag Cole out of the way.  (Kicking and screaming, of course.)  I had purposely placed him down facing away from the door, but the second he was on the floor he had turned around and was off and determined to reach his goal.  Seriously, this was a baby with a mission.  And the kicker is, I had been using distraction techniques all morning when dealing with him and that door.

The student had become the master.

2. I got out the Shake-n-Go racetrack for Josh to play with this morning.  Cole, of course, wanted to play, too.  Josh, of course, was not on board with this.  Every time Cole reached out for a car Josh would freak out and move the car away so Cole couldn't get it.  I kept an eye on things, mainly (I'll admit) to make sure Josh didn't get too frustrated and hit Cole.  

After about ten minutes Cole grabbed a couple of the toy barrels Josh had so carefully placed next to the track and gave them a good throw.  Josh let out a howl of indignation and went after them. The second Josh's attention was elsewhere Cole grabbed the car he had been trying to get for so long.

Impressive.

3. Since Lance went out to dinner for work tonight I decided to take the boys to Burger King. (Their choice, not mine.) Cole happily tried all during the meal to grab anything within a three foot radius of his high chair.  I had been pretty careful about keeping stuff away, especially my drink.  Yes, Cole already knows that when we're out to eat drinks with straws have yummy, sweet, soda in them.  (He's had tastes of Spencer's Sprite several times. *sigh*)  Once he had eaten all of the food I had brought for him, plus the majority of my fries, he settled down to play with the toy the nice cashier had given him.  He played with it nicely for several minutes.

I let my guard down.  He took advantage of the situation.

He very deliberately threw his toy as far as he could.  While I had my back turned to pick it up he snatched my drink and proceeded to start slurping with all his baby might (**How in the world does he know how to use a straw?!?  I haven't taught him!**).  I turned around to the sight of my baby guzzling down my Diet Coke and spilling most of it on his chubby legs.

Oh the howls of indignation as I snatched it away from him!

This child is only eleven months old and apparently already smarter than me.

This does not bode well for the future. 

Cole-Bear Report*

Coley-boley, how in the world are you eleven months old today?!  All of a sudden you just seem so huge and grown up and I'm not quite sure how to take it.  But you are also so happy and entertaining, which makes up for it.  Kind of.

At the ripe old age of eleven months, Mr. Cole likes to:

- Cry before he goes to sleep.  Still.

- Stand up next to furniture. (A feat neither of his brothers accomplished before 14 months old!)

- Crawl and slither his way around the house; especially wherever momma is.

- Steal remote controls and change the channel - much to the annoyance of his brothers.

- Harass Josh while he is laying on the couch eating a snack.  (You don't realize you're harassing him - yet.)

- Have little baby tantrums by banging his fists on the floor and hollering at the top of his lungs.  (It's cute - for now.)

- Eat sand from the sand table.  By the fistful. Yum.

- Try to climb up the slide.

 - Get stuck underneath the kitchen table.  And then fuss until someone rescues him.

- Eat whatever his brothers are eating and make a huge mess.  He also fusses after dinner until you give him a bath - he wants that bath and he wants it now!

- Squawk like a pterodactyl.  Seriously - he sounds just like one, especially when he's happy.

- Take pictures with his momma (who I'm sure he loves best!)

- WIGGLE.  Especially during diaper and clothing changes.

- Drool.  He's a world champ at that lately.

- Be the world's cutest Cole-baby in the world!

*Don't know the reference?  Sad.  Check this out.

Why I Only Vacuum Once a Week

When we first moved into this home I vacuumed every two or three days.  I was pregnant but only had Spencer at home.  Easy!  It only took 15 minutes!  Why in the world did I do it so often? Spencer wasn't that messy!  Good heavens - what did I do with all my extra time then?  I still don't know!

Anywho.

Then Josh came around.  And then Cole.  And now I'm lucky if I vacuum once a week.  Why? 

To start, I have to pick up all the toys that are around the house.  I try to keep the house fairly clean, but I've given up on keeping all the toys off the floor.  It's simply impossible.  So by 'pick up the toys' I mean 'throw them all onto the couch or bed or whatever'.  All the while telling the boys that no, they cannot get more toys out right now.  NO!  

Then I have to do some actual vacuuming.  Easier said than done.  Josh loves to play chicken with the vacuum, which drives me nuts.  He's always getting in the way.  As a result I no longer stop if I know I'm going to run into him.  Hey, if you're gonna play chicken with the vacuum you gotta expect a few bruised toes.

Then there's Cole, who is in love with the vacuum.  He wants to climb on it and play with it and taste it and follow it all around the house.  As he slithers around following me he often gets wrapped up in the cord, forcing me to stop every few minutes to untangle him.

As I vacuum I have to stop every few minutes for the random toys I find.  Does anyone else find toys in the most random spots in their house?  I am forever finding Legos, Hotwheels, blocks, and whatnot in the most unusual places: on my pillow, behind my closet door, in the fridge, in my shoes, etc.

Today I had extra fun - the belt on the vacuum broke when I didn't see some weird, big, metal clippy thing in the office.  Yikes.  I tried to be sneaky about fixing it, but kids have a sixth sense when it comes to projects that would be a lot easier to accomplish without them.  Within minutes I had two little 'helpers', turning what should have been a five minute project into a fifteen minute project.

Josh helped by moving the screws and trying to lose them.  Cole helped by trying to eat all of the fuzz and dust and junk that fell out of the vacuum.  The instructions helped by being poorly translated from Japanese into English.

I finally finish vacuuming, but not before I somehow cut the knuckle of my thumb on the handle, change Cole's poopy diaper, and discover that Josh has spilled his snack all over the floor of a room that I have already vacuumed.

So if you come to my house, please don't closely inspect my carpet.  (And if you do, kindly keep your comments to yourself!) 

Now you'll have to excuse me.  It's time for the quarterly cleaning of the bathrooms.

Bedspread Dilemma

In the winter Lance and I have this really great down comforter that we use on our bed.  It is sooo mosty-toasty and heavy and warm and I just love it.  Seriously, it's one of the few things I look forward to about winter.

Problem is, in the summer it's just too darn hot.  Even with the AC on.  Sure, we could just have it on the bed during the day and take it off at night.  We tried that the first year we lived here; 97% of the time the comforter just stayed on the floor.  

So now in the summer we just use a lightweight quilt that we got as a wedding gift.  It's the perfect weight, but is only a queen size (we have a king bed) and is starting to look its age.  Not very attractive.

So finally, after literally years of kind of looking when I thought about it, and putting it off because it was kind of a chore, I found a coverlet that I liked enough to buy.

Actually, here's the set I originally wanted to get: 

Isn't it sooo pretty?  I really like it.  But Lance was not so excited.  Plus, it was pretty season-specific.  And it came with a heavy comforter, which kinda defeated the whole purpose of this exercise, right?

So I got this coverlet from Target instead.

What do you think?  I think our bed needs some more pillows to be really pretty.  But I know myself and I know Lance and I know that if I put decorative pillows on there they would end up on the floor 97% of the time.  (Or in Josh's room - he's a known pillow thief.)  Heck, the only reason we have the big pillows on top (with the blueish-greenish shams) is because they came with the mattress.  (We use more normal-sized pillows for our normal-sized heads.)  Anywho, the coverlet is the perfect weight and I really like it.

Our old curtains were red to match the duvet on our down comforter, so of course I had to get some new ones.

Yes, I know they need a good ironing.  But they're kinda plain, so I'm planning on getting some green and white ribbon to line the top hem to match the coverlet, and don't want to iron twice.

My dilemma is what do I put just above our bed?  Obviously the framed leaves can't stay because they don't match.  (Lance thinks I'm crazy; I think it's a good thing I do the decorating around here.)  I was thinking of finding some matching fabric and doing something with that and some ribbon and/or paint, and then use those same frames.  (Does that make sense?)

But then last night I found these:

Aren't those frames cool?  And the best part is that they aren't permanent, unlike all the vinyl lettering that is so popular right now.  What do you think - would like look good above our bed?  Would I need to put something 'in' them, or could I just leave them empty?

Or how about these:

Would these look good? I'm pretty sure they're the same color scheme.

Choices choices.  Dilemmas dilemmas.

What would you do?

Congratulations, Kevin!

My little brother just got accepted into the Public Administration graduate program at USC.  We're very proud of you Kevin - way to go! 

Remember way back in December when I made my quick trip to Utah and Kevin had just gotten out of the hospital because of a broken femur?  It was because of that broken femur (and a few other life experiences, I'm sure) that Kevin decided he wanted to go into Health Administration, with a focus on reducing unnecessary spending.  (Something desperately needed, right?)  See Kevin?  Something good did come out of that broken leg. 

Now start packing.  Classes start soon!

p.s.  You hear that distant cheering?  That's not us here in Indiana.  That's Dad and Susie upstairs.  They're finally going to be empty nesters!

Foot Fetish

I've always admired my feet. 

I know that sounds weird, but before you judge me (don't judge me!) just let me say that I'm not obsessed with them or anything.  I just thought they were cute.  Cute toes, good shape, nice color (not counting weird summer sandal tan lines), no scars, just nice. Unlike my weird, stubby hands, but that's another post.

And then a few weeks ago I noticed a callous on my left foot.  I didn't think much of it; I thought it would just go away.  It didn't.  In fact, it got bigger and started to annoy me.  I started to worry.  I was pretty sure I knew what it was.  Going to the podiatrist today confirmed my fear.

That, my friends, is a bunion.  

Apparently I have 80 year old feet.  Okay, not really.  But don't you associate bunions with old people?  I always did.  And I couldn't figure out how I got it, since I only wear high heels four or five times a year, and the rest of the time wear comfy, wide shoes.  But the pediatrician explained that bunions are hereditary - did anyone in my family have them?  Yep - my maternal grandmother did.  Lucky me.  

Drat my genes!

Then he told me what I had already read about online but was hoping was wrong: there's not really much you can do to stop bunions.  Once they're there, they're there. And they're not going away.  You can only slow them down.  Over the next 25 years I have orthopedic inserts, cushions, steroids, cortisone shots, and (finally) surgery to look forward to.  Great.  Just what I wanted to hear.

Wait, no it's not.  What I really wanted to hear was that he had just developed a new therapy that dissolved the bunions so that they never returned and that this therapy came in the form of a hot fudge sundae that I had to eat every month for the rest of my life, and that since I was the first patient to come to his office for bunions after his new therapy had been approved by the FDA, I would get these medicated hot fudge sundaes for free.  Forever.

*sigh*

Instead of leaving his office with a sundae I left with these shoe inserts.  And the knowledge that I will probably have to battle it out with my insurance over the next year to get custom-made orthotics.  Hooray!  My favorite pastime is battling with my insurance company!  (Note the sarcasm here.)

I also got this little pad to help ease some of the pain.

Oh man.  That's a good look, isn't it?

In order to help slow down its progression there's no more running around barefoot or wearing flip flops.  Supportive shoes only!  That's easy enough to follow in the winter, but in the summer?  And with my cruise coming up?  You're killin' me, bunion!  (I'm still wearin' sandals during most of my cruise... I just don't care!)

I know in the grand scheme of things this really isn't that big of a deal; there are a lot of worse things I could be dealing with.  But the fact that there's no cure, and that it's just going to get worse - a lot worse - before I have to have surgery is really bummin' me out.

My poor feet.  And poor me.  I'm totally feeling picked on. 

On the plus side, I think this is the perfect excuse to do a little shoe shopping.

There.  My day just brightened a little.

Happy Birthday Grandma Susie!

We hope you have a wonderful day, Grandma Susie!  We love you very much!

p.s.  Josh also wanted to do a surprise for you.  Her you go. :)

Recent Disappointments

1. Doesn't this dessert look yummy?  I mean, c'mon, it has all those chocolate chips! And a crust!  And the recipe calls for something like 26 pounds of butter, the fruit jam of your choice, and a full can of sweetened condensed milk (a.k.a. nectar of the gods).  Heavenly, right?

Not so much.

I mean, it wasn't gross or anything, but it wasn't nearly as good as it looked.  And that is sooooo disappointing.  Kinda like when you were a kid and you got what you thought was a chocolate chip cookie and it turned out to be raisins.  Disappointment all around.**

2. My allergies have come back with a vengeance.  Stupid allergies.  I thought I had left you for good in California.  (Where I had to quite literally live on Claritin-D every day.)  I was extremely disappointed when they started up here!  Lately they've only been messing with my eyes, but as of last night they are now attacking my throat and lungs.  I gabbed too much at bunco last night, which didn't help any.  I now sound like a 30-year-5-pack-a-day-94-year-old-woman-named-Gladys.  It's quite delightful.  (Who knew bunco had side effects?)

3. And while we're on the subject, I didn't win anything at bunco last night.  And the thing is, you can win a prize for being the best or the worst at that game.  But no, I am the essence of mediocrity when it comes to bunco.  Even although losing is my typical M.O., it was still disappointing because Heidi had cute prizes.

4. Cole has come down with a cold and has decided that I am his human tissue.  By the end of the day I am, quite literally, covered from head to toe in baby snot.  It's not disappointing, but it sure is disgusting.

5. This is totally random, but is anyone else disappointed in this last season of 24?  It used to be so cool.  What happened?  I mean, another mole at CTU?  Really?  You think they would have learned their lesson after the first four or five.  And how Jack stole that helicopter last night?  Totally lame and anticlimactic.  I was waiting for him to make his escape in the Hudson or something.  And does anyone else hate Chloe as much as I do?  Because I REALLY do.  I LOATHE her character, with all her snottiness and sighs of impatience and sneering.  Seriously.  If I were Jack I would have taken a hacksaw to her by now.  A hacksaw-related death for Chloe might not really be warranted, but it would be much more satisfying than this current season of 24.

**After writing that this morning I tried the bars again and they were actually pretty good.  This is definitely a dessert that is much better after aging a little.  I still won't be making them again, though.

Another Year, Another Book

Every March I make a new blog book using Blurb.  (Who I highly recommend.  A little pricey, yes, but in this case you definitely get what you pay for.)

This year I splurged and paid the extra $5 for a wrap-around-image cover, rather than the dust jacket.  I think it will hold up better in the years to come.

I did a lot more full-image pages, too, which I love.

Now I have three blog books plus an entire book of my personal history.  That's the little one on the top - it's black and white, text only.  Wait - what's a personal history?  Y'know - the stuff that's a little too personal to blog about.  (Patriarchal blessing, special memories, etc.) So even though I don't write in a physical journal every day, I think I'd doin' alright with the whole keepin' a personal history thing.

And yes, that is a picture of Lance and I on the top. I'm not a huge fan of the frame, but the photo got wet and is now stuck to the glass.  Oh well.

We were 16 years old.  

Good heavens.

Spring Fest 2010

On Saturday we went up to campus for their annual Spring Fest.  In years past we went mainly for the Roach Races, but this year we decided to keep things short and simple and skipped those.  (I know!  The blasphemy!  But if you're really sad about it, you can relive the glory that is Roach Racing here.)

We spent a lot of time in the Boilermaker Barnyard, where the kiddos got to look at cows, sheep, pigs, etc.  Joshie's favorite part was getting to hold a baby duck and a baby chick.  He was so pleased with himself and so excited!  He particularly liked that the chick kept cheeping at him.  No pictures because I was too busy enjoying Josh's reaction. But I did get a few pictures of these chickens:

And one cute baby rhesus monkey.  (Oh wait - that's Cole.  But lately he's been as clingy as a monkey.  Seriously.)

Josh could have spent hours in that tent - he's turning into a real animal lover.  Spencer was anxious to leave as soon as we got there - he wanted to go spend the $2 I allowed him to bring.  Cole was happy just watching all that was going on.  Lance was grouchy because he doesn't like crowds.

Next we checked out the exotic pinned bug collection.  I didn't know how much the boys would like it, but it turns out that they lurrrrrvved it!  They ran from one collection to the next, oohing and aahhing over the colors and sizes.  Perhaps we have some budding entomologists on our hands?  (That would make Grandpa ElRay proud - he got his Ph.D. in entomology.)  

We wanted to do the bug petting zoo, but the line was way too long, and we had a sleepy monkey, I mean baby, on our hands.  So we headed out to look for the Robotic Battle Beetles, which Spencer really wanted to check out.

On the way Josh had to stop to pet some bunnies.  He was a little nervous at first, but soon got over it.  (I'm proud of him, because he's always been something of a wimp when it comes to animals!)  They were really soft and super-cute. 

Then we had to do a little fishing.  Spencer went first, and of course Josh had to follow.  They were both very pleased with the prizes they found in the 'fish' they caught.

Finally we found the Robotic Battle Beetles, which are just as cool as it sounds.  Well, at least to little boys.  They were these remote controlled beetles, and you had to get your beetle to either flip your opponent over or push him over the edge.  We waited for 10 minutes for these two girls to finish, and the girl in charge of the game finally called it a tie.  Finally, it was Josh and Spencer's turn.  The excitement!  The anticipation!  The battle began!

And promptly ended 90 seconds later when Josh accidentally flipped his own bug over.  Oops.  But Spencer, who was promptly declared the victor, was in heaven.  He even got a Robotic Battle Beetle ribbon.  (Lance and I both thought they should get another chance, since the girls before had played for so long, and each boy had paid $1 to play, but whatever.)

We finished off the outing with milkshakes from Sonic, where I accidentally let Josh's balloon fly out of the van.  OOPS.  Worst mom ever moment.  He was soooo upset.  I felt bad, but what could I do?  He's finally forgiven me, although he asked me several times today where his balloon went.  We finally decided that the balloon flew to Grandpa and Grandma's house in Utah, which seemed to appease him.  (Grandpa and Grandma - if you see a yellow balloon by your house you'll know whose it is!)

Army Slither

Mr. Cole has been kinda clingy and grouchy lately.  I think he's teething.  (Isn't that the standard answer for any baby illness/grouchiness/change in behavior?)  I tried to get a peek at his mouth, but it ended about as well as you would expect when putting a finger in a mouth with two razor-sharp chompers just rairin' to chew.

Anywho, I spent a good portion of the afternoon with a baby literally attached at the hip.

This made Cole very happy.  And me very tired.  (Slings are great, but you're still luggin' around an extra 23 pounds of baby.)  Doesn't he look so content?  His expression is something along the lines of "Yeah, I totally got what I wanted.  I've got this lady wrapped around my little finger.  Which I am now going to chew.  *Nom*Nom*Nom*"

And maybe he does, a little.  But could you say no to that face?  Besides, they're only babies for so long.

I later experimented with the 'back hold', where the baby rides on your back.  This was great until I felt him trying to bite me, which ended the experiment rather abruptly, much to his dismay.

Fortunately, he was later appeased with the swing.

When Cole's not feeling clingy, there's nothing he likes better than to crawl around the house and explore.  Well, I don't know if crawl is the right word.  It looks more like a painful army slither, or (as Lance said) he's awkwardly swimming on the carpet.  Well, whatever, it gets him where he wants to be!

p.s.  Did you like the fig leaf on Spencer in the shower?  Just thought I'd show off a little of my mad video editing skillz.

Spaghetti Dinner

As you can see, Cole really likes spaghetti.  Especially cut up meatballs.  And flinging the spaghetti on the floor?  Totally fun. 

Cole was the messiest of the three boys, but oddly, not by much.

Baby Cage

Now that Cole is mobile he has become a little, chubby destruction machine.  He's curious, fairly speedy, strong, and (most dangerously) sneaky.

Thus the baby cage is back out.  And he loves it.  (Well, for about 15 minutes at a time.  But that's enough for a shower!)

And no, he doesn't also defy gravity.  That would be a terrifying and completely unfair new superpower.  No,  for whatever reason the picture won't turn.  Stupid Blogger.

Self-portrait Tuesday: Chillin' at the Park

Dreaded Chore

Time to sort and store the boys' clothes.  Time to put away anything that's too big (I shop end-of-season sales), too small, or for the wrong season.  Time to put away all of the infant stuff because Cole is now a great big beast of a baby.  Time to get rid of those articles of clothing that couldn't withstand repeated stains, skidding on the knees, or other little boy abuses.

I HATE this chore.  I don't know why.  I just do.

Time to sigh.  *sigh*  And maybe drink a Cherry Coke Zero.

That's Josh

Want to know what kind of child Josh is?

This afternoon we made some bar cookies for Family Home Evening tonight.  Josh was my good helper, and by helper I mean he made the process twice as long and five times as dirty as necessary.  (But you already knew that about Josh, right?  (Or any other three year old for that matter.)

The bar cookies were finally done and I pulled them out of the oven.  Josh, hearing me in the kitchen, ran in to check things out.  I set the hot pan on a cooling rack on the counter.

Me: Josh, don't touch the bar cookies.  They are very hot!

Josh: Okay.

Josh climbs up on his chair to get a closer look.

Me: I mean it.  Do NOT touch them!  The pan is still VERY hot!

Josh: Okay.

Me: If you touched them it would hurt.  A LOT.

At which point Josh very deliberately stuck two fingers out and touch the pan - for several seconds - before squealing and pulling his hand away.

THAT is the very essence of Josh.  Testing everything I say, no matter how common sense it is.

Heaven help us all when he's a teenager and I have to warn him about the dangers of texting and driving, pre-marital sex, chainsaws, and baggy pants. 

Dr. Destructo Hiatus

Dr. Destructo used to be quite a regular feature on this blog.  (Remember this?  And this?  Or this?)  But he's been on hiatus lately.

Until last week.

I keep two of my extra dining chairs in the office.  (My dining room isn't really big enough to hold all eight.)  Usually the boys leave them alone, but for some reason Josh recently decided that was the chair he wanted to sit on while playing computer.  I had caught him a couple of times leaving back in his other (smaller) chair, and had warned him about that.  So when I heard a loud crash and a cry from Josh, I had a pretty good idea what had happened.

I was right.  The chair was on the floor, in pieces, with Josh writhing around on top.  I'll be the first to admit that I was more concerned about the chair at first that about the child.  But that's only because I knew he was okay.  No blood!  No broken bones!  He was fine.  Better off than the chair.

My poor chair.  Just look at Dr. Destructo's work:

(These pictures were all taken after I had kind of pieced it back together.)

Good thing I have a handy husband.  A little wood glue and a clamp later and voila:

You can hardly even tell that the chair was ever broken.  Good job Lance.

Hopefully Dr. Destructo will go on a long vacation again.  And soon.