Cruise 2010 - Jamaica (Ya Mon!)

The next morning I woke up and read for a while on the balcony again.  In the distance I could see Jamaica, and watched as we got closer and closer.  It was a bit cloudy and hazy, but I could make out that it was green, lush, and mountainous.

Everything a tropical paradise is supposed to be, right?

Then we pulled up to port in Ocho Rios

Er...

Hmm...

Well, that's kinda interesting...

Okay, not exactly the most scenic port. But if you look down shore... Ah, that's better.

Lance and I got ready, had a light (haha) breakfast, and were off.

In order to get there we had to ride in a 12-seat tour van.  And by ride I mean grip the seats with white knuckles while the crazy driver told jokes and darted in and out of traffic.  On the wrong side of the road. (Those crazy ex-British colonies!) Okay, it wasn't that bad.  It was actually fairly entertaining.  But I think it can be safely said that traffic laws are very loosely followed and/or enforced in Ocho Rios.

Our first excursion was hiking Dunn's River Falls. 

It. Was. Awesome.

First we saw these really cool trees:

Okay, that's not the awesome part.  I just had to throw the pictures in somewhere.  Anyways, back to the awesomeness.

As we followed our perpetually exuberant tour guide, Oliver, we were first met with this view (which, of course, is even better in real life):

And then this:

Yep.  The falls actually end at the beach.  HOW COOL IS THAT?!?  (Answer: very.)  They are about 600 feet high and 1,000 feet long.  It wasn't treacherous by any means, but a bit slick at parts, so Oliver made us all hold hands and form a long chain for most of the hike up.

(Side note: Oliver had been giving these tours for years.  All tourists had to wear water shoes of some sort, but Oliver didn't - his feet were totally calloused and perfect for this from the thousands of times he had made the trip.  Crazy.)

We had to get a few pictures in before our hike.  The camera was in it's waterproof case, thus the steamy haze.  (It really wasn't steamy hot - in fact, it was quite pleasant.)

Actually, that last picture looks more like we're glowing.  I promise, it was steam, not the fact that we are secretly vampires.

At several points along the way our tour guides would stop us for photo shoots.  They'd even offer to take pictures for you!  But the price was that you had to get in the water, which was a bit of a shock at first. 

Of course we had to get at least one self-portrait.

And foot shot.  This foot is saying, "Omigosh this is such a blast!"  Also, "The rest of my body is going to fall down in 3...2...1..."

There were also points at which they made you slide down the natural slides, or fall back into pools - no exceptions for anyone!  And it was a blast!  (Not that any of these pictures show that - we were too busy sliding and falling and such.)

It took around 45 minutes to reach the top.  I was disappointed there wasn't more - we would have gone again if we could!  But it was time to dry off and head to our next destination: Mystic Mountain.

Oh, but first I should mention that we had to run the gauntlet through all of gift shops and completely over-the-top pushy sales people.  Seriously, it was ridiculous.  Jamaicans?  Totally friendly - especially when they want to sell you something.

To get to the top of Mystic Mountain you take a ride on a ski lift through the rain forest.  The views were spectacular.

The filming was not.  But I guess it is entertaining.

Lance likey the kissey pictures.  I humor him.

Just like he humors me with the self-portraits.

And foot portraits.  These feet are saying, "Look at those pretty orange flowers!"  Also, "We're getting a little swollen from dangling off of this chair lift!"

We got to the top and had a look around the little museum they had.  There was a section on the history of Jamaica (did you know Columbus was marooned there for a few years?), pirates (I loves me a good pirate story), rum manufacturing (clear rum - too new; dark rum - just right), and, of course, the Olympic Jamaican Bobsled Team.

Wait, what? 

Don't worry, it will all become clear quite soon.  But first we have to climb a few stories up to the top of the lookout and take some pictures of some fabulous looking tourists.

There we go.  Please note that that is water on my shirt, not sweat.  Thank you.

So anyways, back to the bobsledding.  There's a reason that was part of the museum: we were going to bobsled in Jamaica, mon!

I know.  You think that's totally touristy; cheesy even.  To you I say, perhaps.  But it was also really fun.  And you're just jealous.

So we thought it'd be like the Alpine Slide in Park City, UT - a bobsled with a break on a slick cement track.  But this was more like a mini roller coaster, only with single cars (bobsleds) and breaks.  It was great.  Seriously, zooming down a mountain, through the lush rain forest, in a bobsled, in Jamaica?  Way fun.

I didn't get any pictures or video during the downhill part; I was too busy enjoying it all.  But I did snap a few as the bobsled was being pulled back up the track.

And of course one of these.  These feet are saying, "Stop with the shayayayayayaking!"

Also, "Thank you."

Poor Lance.  He was in the car ahead of me so he didn't get to be in the self-portrait.

I'm sure he's heartbroken.

We happily made our way down the mountain the same way we came up.  It was nice to just relax and swing in the breeze.

After all that fun we decided to grab a little lunch.  I know we shouldn't have, but we were tired and hungry and didn't feel like marching all around Ocho Rios for lunch, so we stopped at a restaurant right in the middle of the tourist section.  This is where we were introduced to the aforementioned $4 Diet Coke.  But in my defense, the water was just as much, and quite frankly I don't trust bottled water in touristy areas of foreign countries.  (The locals have been known to refill the bottles with tap water and sell them as new.)

So there.  Besides, it tasted great with my over-priced (but still quite tasty) curried shrimp and rice.  Mmmm...

After lunch we walked around and window shopped a bit.  We also saw a bit more of down town, not-so-welcoming-to-tourists, Ocho Rios.  Totally my fault there.  But what in the world was Lance doing, letting me lead the way?  Really, he should have known better.

We eventually made our way back to friendlier climes, bought some souvenirs, and even found a hat for me that wasn't outrageously priced or looked too stupid on me.  (I look terrible in most hats.)  (Okay, I look terrible in all hats, but some less so.)  Oh yeah - we also got a free Jamaican shot glass that we were planning on giving to Susie as a gag gift, but we completely forgot.  I'm sure you're just devestated, Susie.

It was finally time to get back on the ship.  We were grungy, exhausted, a little bit poorer, and ready for a quick shower and a long nap.  All good signs of a great excursion day!

I sat on our balcony as we set sail (so to speak) and watched Jamaica get smaller.  

I also made an anklet out of some of the sea shells and raffia that had been on my hat.  My feet approved. (But they were too tired to say anything.)

(Side note: Christy, you would be proud of me.  I crafted on my cruise!  I took all the tacky raffia off of my hat and used my sewing to kit to sew on a cheap, but way cuter, Jamaican beaded necklace.)

That evening for dinner we had reservations at Sabatini's.  Most cruise ships now have optional restaurants that you can eat at for a cover charge, and we decided to check this one out.

Good call.

Sabatini's offers a tasting menu, which means you get a bit of everything on the menu.  (Except the main dish and dessert; you just choose one item then.)  We had two plates of appetizers, salad, two kinds of pasta, a main dish, and a dessert.  The food just kept coming and coming and it was all sooooo delicious and the service was amazing.  I could rave on and on, but it doesn't really matter since I didn't take any pictures.  (It was a bit too fancy for flash photography, you know?)

After dinner we rolled (because we were so full we couldn't really walk) around the promenade deck for a while and then decided to check out the karaoke contest.  This was fairly entertaining.  My favorite was this old guy named Bob who sang "All My Exes Live in Texas".  Classic.  And the perfect way to end the day.