Me: You are quite the snarky little lady today, Tess.
Tess: I'm not snarky! AND I'M NOT A LADY! I'm a sister.
Tess: What's "issues" mean?
Me: Um, usually issues are like problems.
Tess: Well, I've been having some real issues lately.
Me: Tess, calm down! What's the problem?
Tess: I just can't handle Cole anymore! He is too much for me.
(While watching a cheesy puppy documentary on Netflix.)
Tess: I wish I was one of those.
Me: What, a dog?
Tess (dreamily): Yeah...
Lance: What kind of dog would you be?
Tess: A fast one.
Tess (quite alarmed): I'm losing my noise!
Me: You're what now?
Tess (in a raspy voice): I'm losing my noise! My noise! My sound is gone!
Me: Oh, your voice. You're losing your voice?
Tess: Yeah, my noise is gone.
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