Naked Church-goers

Lance is the Executive Secretary for our ward, so he's always at church a lot earlier than the rest of us.  Which means I have the fun job of getting all of the kiddos dressed and off to church in time.  For about six months now Josh has been difficult on Sunday mornings.

Okay, that's putting it a little too mildly.  He's been a little imp of Satan.

Every week I have to fight, threaten, argue, and finally force him to get dressed.  For whatever reason he thinks that if he doesn't get dressed then he doesn't have to go to church.  Which makes no sense whatsoever because that has never happened and never will.  Three-year-old logic, I guess.

I hate Sunday mornings.  Loathe them.  Dread them.

So yesterday I decided to try a different tactic.  If he fought me on getting dressed then I would just not get him dressed; as simple as that.  I got his underpants on when the real fighting began.  Instead of arguing, reasoning, threatening, etc., I just calmly told him that I had other things that needed to get done rather than fight with him.  If he wanted to get dressed he could come find me and I'd help.  Otherwise, he just would not be getting dressed.

He couldn't believe his good luck.  He smiled and ran around and shouted "I'm not going!  No church!" 

To which I burst his bubble and replied, "Oh, you're going to church.  You'll just go in your underpants."

He stopped in his tracks and gave me an "I'm not sure I really believe you, Mother Dear" look.  I left the room and worked on getting Cole dressed and ready.

Twenty-five minutes later and he was still runnin' around in his skivvies.  I asked him one more time if he wanted to get dressed.  He backed away, afraid that I'd grab him and force the issue.  "No."

"Alright then," I replied.  And I started to put his church clothes in a bag.  "Grab your blankie; you'll be cold in the car with no clothes on."

It took some cajoling, but he got in the car.  He was not happy about it at all, but he didn't fight nearly as much as I thought he would.  I think he was a bit in disbelief about the whole situation.

We got to church and he kind of freaked out, but mainly because I wouldn't let him bring his blankie in.  We have a solid 'no blankie' rule that goes into effect once the blankie becomes a source of entertainment rather than comfort.

We were just outside the Primary room and in the foyer area for a while.  Josh decided that he wanted to go into the chapel, where he thought it would be warmer.

"Sorry," I said. "Little boys who don't have clothes on most definitely cannot go into the chapel.  That is a very special room to Heavenly Father and we need to be reverent and respectful in there.  If you don't want to wear clothes to church, that's fine.  But you won't be in the chapel.  You'll be in a boring classroom with mommy or daddy, with no books and no toys.  And you will have sit on a chair the whole time."

Josh pensively mulled this over.  He knew I had the upper hand.

And then a family with five little girls walked in. 

Josh rushed in the Primary room, where I was.  He looked at me.  He looked at the little girls.  He tried to hide behind me.  I moved.  He looked up at me, defeated, and growled "I want my clothes!"

So I helped him get dressed.  He wouldn't wear his tie, but I figured he'd had enough punishment for one morning.

*******

Just as a side note, this exact same thing happened to my mom with my youngest brother, Kevin, when he was around Josh's age.  My mom was the Primary President at the time and my dad was the bishop, so she had to get all three of us kids dressed and off to church by herself, too.  For whatever reason Kevin hated church at the time and kept having fits about it all.  And one week my mom really had to be to church early, so she took Kevin in just his underpants and dropped him off in my dad's office once we got there.  Kyle and I thought it was hysterical.  Kevin did not.  I think my dad wisely kept his opinion to himself.

It's all just a little bit of history repeated, isn't it?