It started with me going the wrong way to swimming lessons. My brain was who knows where else and suddenly I found myself driving to the stake center instead. Dang it. So Spencer and Josh were a little late for their lessons, which made them understandably a bit upset.
It was also only about 52 degrees this morning, which made for COLD swimming lessons. This also made all of the kids understandably upset.
After lessons all of the kids were freezing and refused to listen to any of my instructions about going into the locker rooms to change. And even though they did this all the time last year it was like they, too, had lost their brains and couldn't function. Spencer, Josh, and Cole went into the men's locker room while I took Tess into the women's. After she got changed we waited for the boys, where my friend Cyndi brought Cole to me, who apparently had been left behind or lost or something even though I had seen him going into the locker room - with his brothers - less than 5 minutes earlier.
Needless to say, I was pretty ticked at all three of them.
So I sent Cole in to get changed, with strict instructions to find his brothers and get his clothes.
Then Spencer came out - CRYING - that he had lost his shirt. Yes. Crying. It was really, really fun. He claims he had the shirt by his towel before getting into the pool, but somewhere during that time some hard-hearted criminal MUST have scooped it up and stolen it, because it was nowhere to be found.
I would have a bit more sympathy for the boy, but he is forever losing things. Actually, he doesn't lose things - he just refuses to look for them. At all. Thus, they are lost forever. I looked around the pool deck and it wasn't there, so I'm assuming it's somewhere in the men's locker room, which I can't go into. It'll either be in the lost and found tomorrow or on some lucky kid who found it and decided to keep it.
Fortunately for Spencer Josh inexplicably had brought two shirts with him, one of which was Spencer's size. (I don't know why. There are a lot things I don't understand about that boy.) It fit perfectly, but Spencer hated it because it was a polo shirt and because it was Josh's. I told him wear it or not, I didn't care. Since he was so cold he wore it, but glared at me the entire time.
Meanwhile, Josh came out wearing pants that were a good 6 inches too short. "Go back in and switch pants with Cole. You're wearing his pants," I told him.
"No I'm not!!" he protested.
"Josh. Look down. You're wearing the wrong pants. Look how short they are!"
"Fine." *stomp*stomp*stomp*
Josh came out a few minutes later wearing the exact same pants but swearing up and down that he had changed.
Whatever, you ding-a-ling.
Meanwhile, Cole was calling for me from the men's locker room. I kept telling him I couldn't come in. He wouldn't tell his brothers what he needed. I never found out what his problem was, but it took him a good 10 minutes just to get changed.
Finally, FINALLY, we were all set and ready to go. But I decided to check the pool deck one more time for that shirt. Only Cole FREAKED OUT because he couldn't see Tess in the crowd and shrieked at the top of his lungs during the swim instructor's little beginning of the year speech for the next class, so that was fun. Then Cole did it again. AND AGAIN.
By that point I decided no shirt was worth this and grabbed him roughly by the arm, pulling him kicking and screaming. The other kids followed.
I debated about whether or not I should still take them to the library to sign them up for the summer reading program. But I decided we might as well; how much worse could things get?
With mucho, mucho threats we walked up to the building, where we discovered a fiberglass bear. I don't know why the bear was there, but it was decided that a picture was needed. Only at the last second Tess decided she didn't want to be in it and I didn't feel like fighting over that.
Please notice Josh's super short pants. I really wish I had gotten all of him in the frame!
So the library was a mad house because everyone had the same idea we did, but we eventually got everyone signed up and ready. But then no one seemed capable at all at getting books for themselves, even though they've done that a ton of times, too. So we had to pick out books for each child, all while Cole FREAKED OUT if one person wasn't in his line of sight. Even more fun when he claimed he didn't want any books, but I knew he'd be really made when we got home if he didn't have any, so I forced him into the fact books section and chose a bunch of books about planets that he swore - loudly - up and down that he didn't want. (And which he read all afternoon.)
It was finally time to check out our books. And then Tess and Cole decided it was finally time to destroy those little rope-like thingies that show you where to stand in line. I'm usually pretty good about keeping them away from them, but Spencer and Josh fighting distracted me, and before I knew it Cole had retracted two of the sections and then I watched Tess get hit on the face by one retracting really fast and then screech about it.
The joy.
We could not get out of there fast enough.
THEN.
We had lunch. Only not all of us, because Cole was being SO VERY NAUGHTY. So very naughty that I had to remove him from the table and declare that he had to eat alone after we were all done since he didn't seem to remember how to behave while eating a meal with other people. (Read: we don't start fist fights or throw food. EVER.)
This was, of course, not very well-received from the offending party. It did not help matters at all that the other three cheered as I dragged him away.
After everyone was done eating I declared that it was basement time for the next hour at least, and that they were to all stay down there and not come up unless someone was bleeding. Profusely.
Which, to their credit, they did.
The rest of the day wasn't that bad. Just long. And there was some bleeding. (Not profuse, though.) And more time outs. And laundry to fold and jam to make and menus to plan and grocery lists to fill.
And now it's bedtime.
Hopefully the second day of summer vacation will be a little easier.
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