Sundays are Hard

I don't know how or why, but Tess always starts Sunday in her best clothes and then ends the day looking like a homeless ragamuffin. It's really quite impressive.

Happy 37th Birthday, Lance!

Lance had a very adult birthday this year. Adult in that it was not much celebrated on his actual birthday. Poor Lance.

The day started well. Since it was Tuesday I figured it would be fun to have pancake tacos for breakfast. (Taco Tuesday...) The idea was great, the execution not so much. Pancakes full of scrambled eggs and bacon are hard to hold. But it all tasted fantastic, and that's what really matters.  I made a pancake the size of a dinner plate, and that was pretty fantastic as well.

The kids gave Lance the cards they had made for him the day before. My favorite was Coles, because it was so very Coley. He made me write "Daddy, your birthday is Tuesday, June 9th." Cole wrote "And you are going to turn 37. Love Cole." You know, just in case Lance forgot that information.

And thus endeth the pictures I took on that day. I didn't even get one of the birthday boy. I barely even saw the birthday boy.

Lance was at work all day, as per usual. Around 2pm Spencer started to complain about ear pain, and I was 100% sure it was swimmer's ear. A quick emergency trip to the pediatrician confirmed this. By the time we were done with the doctor appointment it was almost time for the first of two parties we were going to that night. Plus, that party was in Battle Ground, and it didn't make sense to go all the way home when we were already in town and halfway there. So we drove separately and met up there.

The first (non-Lance-birthday) party was for our friends the Frys. The Frys moved to Indiana to go to school a year after we did. Which means they have been here for TEN YEARS. (Two years longer than they had planned.) If it had been anyone else we probably would've skipped the party and gone out to eat for Lance's birthday. But it was the Frys and their graduating and getting a job and moving was a pretty big deal. (We were sure it was really happening or just a rumor and had to see it for ourselves.) ((Just kidding, Heidi.))

The party was held at the Munguia's home, which is big and sprawling and had a huge lawn and game room, which the kids loved. It was nice to catch up with people from the first ward who we don't get to see much of. I sat at a table with the Grishoms, Dixons, and Provonshas and realized that when we first moved to Lafayette these were the "old" established families who had been around for a long time - but now THAT'S US. We are now one of the old established families who came for school and stayed. Mind blown.

We had to leave the Fry party early in order to make it to the Asay's ice cream party. But first we had to get through the hell that is West Lafayette construction traffic. Good heavens, it was the pits.

The ice cream party was really great and it was fun to chat with friends from our ward. The kids had a blast and ran around like wild lunatics and ate a ton of sugar. I had to leave for about 20 minutes to pick up Spencer's prescription before the pharmacy closed, so that was a bummer. But it was still a nice night.

By the time we made it home it was well past bed time, but we still had to open Lance's gifts. And by gifts I mean I put slips of paper in the punchboard (Remember? I made one for Cole's birthday, and it was awesome.) and Lance had to punch them to get them out. He was nice enough to let the kids punch some for him. He won things like a hug from Cole and playing computer with Spencer and a box of Fruity Pebbles all for himself. I gave him an overnight stay at the end of the month for us in Indy, as well as one for when we're out in Utah this summer. (I am awesome, right?)

When that was all done we thought it was time for bed, until we realized Cole was freaking out. "Daddy's NOT 37 yet! Not yet! He has to blow out the candles!" Apparently you do not age unless a candle is blown out. Where was this piece of information five years ago?! Ha. Well, we had no cake, so Lance got out a tea light, lit it, we sang Happy Birthday, and then he blew it out. And magically he turned 37 and Cole was satisfied.

Lest you think Lance really was picked on, he had a big LAN party here last night. (It should be called and LANce party...) I think a grand time was had by all. I made three trays of cheeseburger sliders and there was a TON of junk food the few times I ventured downstairs. I had intentions of taking a few pictures but completely forgot about it. I blame the wafts of testosterone that emanated from the basement all evening.

A happy, happy birthday to you, Lance! I hope you had a good birthday and week.

If I had Cole write a card for me for you, it would say something along the lines of "You are married to Maren. She loves you very, very much. I want to go to Minnesota. When are we going there? Love, Cole."

This and That - Summer Edition

This has been a busy week, and usually that means a lot of blog fodder, but this time it just meant I fell in to bed exhausted each night, not even thinking of blogging. There have been a ton of little things I have meant to blog about - like Cole's new found love of maps and his insistence that we have all been to China and that we MUST go to Minnesota soon. Or Tess deciding she can no longer find her towel for swim lessons - ever. Every morning I refuse to find it for her and every morning she has a tantrum and then eventually finds the dang thing where she left it. Sheesh.

Last Saturday we went to the Louisville Temple. Cole was excited to be in Kentucky. (A new state to visit!) ((I didn't tell him we had been there before.)) Josh and Spencer were excited to eat at McDonald's. Tess refused to sit at the center of the picture, so all the boys crowded around her.

They all really wanted a picture on the bench. But not really, because this is how they acted.

Josh, Tess, and Cole claimed that the McDonald's PlayPlace in Shelbyville, KY, was AWESOME. Spencer claimed he was too old for this and was bored, so I sent him back to the car and he spent a good hour reading Harry Potter 7. The apple doesn't fall far...

We've been going to the library on Mondays. I'm biting my tongue because Josh considers Garfield books the highest literature right now. Spencer is reading 2-3 long chapter books at one time. (But, to his credit, he FINALLY finished Harry Potter 7 on Saturday.) Cole is fueling his space obsession with fact books about the individual planets. And Tess is determined to read every Fancy Nancy book ever written. If that's not a good example of their individual personalities, I don't know what is!

We are continuing our tradition of going out for lunch each summer and ranking the restaurants. Today was Sonic, which ranked low for me because it's a pain to order and an even bigger pain to feed kids in the car.

Plus, it seems like where ever we go, people are baffled when we order for 6. Is 6 really that big for a family? Perhaps this requires its own blog post.

Me: Tess, smile!
Tess: .....
Me: Lovely...

Today was the last day of our first session of swimming lessons. Swimming has been dictating a lot of our activities because it takes up a good chunk of the morning. Several of my good friends have their kids in lessons around the same time, so we've been able to visit every weekday, which was great! I may or may not have looked forward to those lessons more than the kids. (I know I did on some of those 50 degree mornings!)

I was informed I had to take lots of pictures today. I obliged.

Here's Mr. Spencer getting ready to jump.

Go, Josh! Go!

I love my boys. They're all gangly arms and legs! :)

Super Spencer!

Miss Tess was harder to photograph. She's had a harder time with swimming this session, I think because she had a scare at one of the pools at Disney World. No matter - she'll get over it in her own time.

Cole squirting his teacher.

Cole's teacher exacting her revenge.

My kids LOVE gifs. So I made a few.

This is what happens when you squirt the level 1-2 teacher. I'm pretty sure Cole squirted her several times.

That kid loves to rough house!

Josh's oh-so-graceful flip. His poor back was all pink afterward, but hey, kudos to him for doing so many flips off the board!

Spencer's traditional Spread Eagle jump.

Lance's birthday was also this week, but since his real party (read: LAN party) is tonight, a post on that will have to come later.

It's thundering and lightening like crazy right now. I like these noisy and big Midwest storms. (As long as they don't turn into tornadoes. Or come in the middle of the night and wake me up.) We spent the afternoon at our neighborhood pool, cooling off in the 90+ degree heat with a bunch of friends. The world is green and lush, the humidity has set in, and we don't have to worry about homework or school projects. Summer's here and I love it!

Skydiving

Tess just saw someone skydiving on TV. (Bill Nye the Science Guy, in case you were wondering.) She has now decided that she needs to do this. But with a little help.

Tess: I want to do that! I want to jump out there!

Me: You want to go skydiving?!

Tess: Yes. Only you can hold me so I won't be scared. You can hold me.

Me: You want me to hold you. While we jump out of a plane.

Tess: Yes. It will be fun! But I will be scared. But you can have a teal one [parachute] because that is your favorite color. And I will have a Frozen one!

Me: A teal parachute, huh?

Tess: And I will have a Frozen one with Anna! And I will be scared but you will hold me!

Me: When should we do this?

Tess: July. When we go to July. Then we will fall out of the plane.

Me: Only if that's July 2000-never.

Tess: What?

Me: Nothing. Sounds like a plan. A very bad plan.

Tess: Yup.

Man, I love this girl.

Death March #1: Battleground Monument

I have discovered that Cole really misbehaves when he's bored or has too much energy. Well, he misbehaves when he's entertained or really tired, too, but he misbehaves less when I can give him something to do.

So, in an effort to keep the peace, get us out of the house, and get a little exercise, I've decided to take the kiddos on hikes at least once a week during summer vacation.

Today we hiked 2 miles on the Wabash Heritage Trail, starting at the Battleground Monument. And by hike I mean a glorified walk in the woods, which is perfect when you have a four year old bringing up the rear.

The boys were impressed by the big trees. (This wasn't the biggest one we saw, just the only one we bothered to take a picture of.)

Miss Tess didn't want to be in the picture because she saw some bugs crawling on the tree. She's not what you would call a nature lover. She complained about it being so dirty and that it smelled funny. (The forest smelled like forest. She didn't like it.) City girl.

There were lots of little bridges to cross and several muddy spots we had to navigate. The kids complained about that until I told them it was like getting to the next level in a video game. "Get through without stepping in the mud and you get to level 10!"

Just a little proof that I was there. Don't I look like the epitome of an evil dictator, forcing them to march unreasonable distances on lovely, summer days?

We may not have mountains, but we certainly have greenery! All the lush green is one of my favorite things about Indiana.

They tuckered out towards the end, but powered through. Even Tess held up reasonably well; I didn't carry her once.

Spencer, however... well, our resident Boy Scout acted as if he was gonna die. Whining, complaining, weeping, wailing... I know that all he was really concerned about was getting home to get some computer time. Punk.

They're supposed to be showing off their muscles...

Not a bad way to spend a beautiful afternoon!

Baseball Game & Lost Phone

We spent this afternoon at Victory Field, cheering on Indy's minor league team, the Indianapolis Indians. The Reams joined us, making a beautiful day at the park even better!

Between dealing with the kids, trips to and from the bathroom, and chatting with Gigi I saw about four full plays. No matter - the Indians beat the Bison, 3-0.

This boy. THIS BOY. So cute, so grouchy. Serious attitude problem right now. What do you do with a belligerent, disrespectful SIX year old? Time outs don't seem to work. Neither do threats. Nor positive reinforcement. Nor negative. Nor ignoring him. Nor paying more attention. Perhaps the Marines could use a super villain in training... (BTW, he has started memorizing everyone's birthdays, birth years, and birth places. If he asks you for your SSN#, DO NOT GIVE IT TO HIM.)

At the end of the end of the game we tried to get a good picture of all six kids. This was a futile endeavor. Here, only Josh is looking normal and/or looking at the camera. Oh sure, Cole's looking too, but he also has a death grip on his nether-regions...

Everyone's looking at the camera! Except Tess. That punk.

More posing from Spencer. More punkness from Tess.

Now Logan is pointing, Bergen is biting, Tess is fuming, and Cole has had enough...

Now we have some awkward scouts. And awkward hands on pants from Cole. (Why?!?)

And then Spencer apparently decided to start Vogueing.

And then Tess had enough. And I gave up.

Right before leaving Tess turned into Elton John. Those are some pretty fancy glasses. She wore this all the way back to the car.

And all the way back to the car was pretty far. We didn't get there until right before the game, and all of the closer parking was sold out, so we had to park at Lucas Oil Stadium. We had to walk a good 1/2 mile there and back, which doesn't sound like that far, but with four kids who seem to be completely oblivious to very fast traffic it is.

We walked all the way back and loaded up the car when I realized that I had left my phone in the bathroom at Victory Field.

%&#*@!!!

So we drove back to the field, which, because of traffic and lights and one way streets, took just as long as walking. I prayed the entire time - losing my phone would be like losing a part of me! Why couldn't I have lost of one my kids instead? Particularly that difficult one? (Just kidding. I did not pray for this.) ((The kid thing. I totally prayed for the phone.))

Fortunately, my phone was quickly found. The nice workers there had it for me. The kids were impressed because we got to walk around the grandstand area (we had been sitting in the cheapo lawn seats). What could have been a tragic ending to a great day turned out to help bolster my belief in humanity and in answers to prayers. Score!

Hard First Day

Today was a really hard first day of summer vacation. (Okay, I know that Friday was the official first day, but the kids and I all agreed that today felt like the really real first day. About the only thing we agreed on today.)

It started with me going the wrong way to swimming lessons. My brain was who knows where else and suddenly I found myself driving to the stake center instead. Dang it. So Spencer and Josh were a little late for their lessons, which made them understandably a bit upset.

It was also only about 52 degrees this morning, which made for COLD swimming lessons. This also made all of the kids understandably upset.

After lessons all of the kids were freezing and refused to listen to any of my instructions about going into the locker rooms to change. And even though they did this all the time last year it was like they, too, had lost their brains and couldn't function. Spencer, Josh, and Cole went into the men's locker room while I took Tess into the women's.  After she got changed we waited for the boys, where my friend Cyndi brought Cole to me, who apparently had been left behind or lost or something even though I had seen him going into the locker room - with his brothers - less than 5 minutes earlier.

Needless to say, I was pretty ticked at all three of them.

So I sent Cole in to get changed, with strict instructions to find his brothers and get his clothes.

Then Spencer came out - CRYING - that he had lost his shirt. Yes. Crying. It was really, really fun. He claims he had the shirt by his towel before getting into the pool, but somewhere during that time some hard-hearted criminal MUST have scooped it up and stolen it, because it was nowhere to be found.

I would have a bit more sympathy for the boy, but he is forever losing things. Actually, he doesn't lose things - he just refuses to look for them. At all.  Thus, they are lost forever. I looked around the pool deck and it wasn't there, so I'm assuming it's somewhere in the men's locker room, which I can't go into. It'll either be in the lost and found tomorrow or on some lucky kid who found it and decided to keep it.

Fortunately for Spencer Josh inexplicably had brought two shirts with him, one of which was Spencer's size. (I don't know why. There are a lot things I don't understand about that boy.) It fit perfectly, but Spencer hated it because it was a polo shirt and because it was Josh's. I told him wear it or not, I didn't care. Since he was so cold he wore it, but glared at me the entire time.

Meanwhile, Josh came out wearing pants that were a good 6 inches too short. "Go back in and switch pants with Cole. You're wearing his pants," I told him.

"No I'm not!!" he protested.

"Josh. Look down. You're wearing the wrong pants. Look how short they are!"

"Fine." *stomp*stomp*stomp*

Josh came out a few minutes later wearing the exact same pants but swearing up and down that he had changed.

Whatever, you ding-a-ling.

Meanwhile, Cole was calling for me from the men's locker room. I kept telling him I couldn't come in. He wouldn't tell his brothers what he needed. I never found out what his problem was, but it took him a good 10 minutes just to get changed.

Finally, FINALLY, we were all set and ready to go. But I decided to check the pool deck one more time for that shirt. Only Cole FREAKED OUT because he couldn't see Tess in the crowd and shrieked at the top of his lungs during the swim instructor's little beginning of the year speech for the next class, so that was fun. Then Cole did it again. AND AGAIN.

By that point I decided no shirt was worth this and grabbed him roughly by the arm, pulling him kicking and screaming. The other kids followed.

I debated about whether or not I should still take them to the library to sign them up for the summer reading program. But I decided we might as well; how much worse could things get?

With mucho, mucho threats we walked up to the building, where we discovered a fiberglass bear. I don't know why the bear was there, but it was decided that a picture was needed. Only at the last second Tess decided she didn't want to be in it and I didn't feel like fighting over that.

Please notice Josh's super short pants. I really wish I had gotten all of him in the frame!

So the library was a mad house because everyone had the same idea we did, but we eventually got everyone signed up and ready. But then no one seemed capable at all at getting books for themselves, even though they've done that a ton of times, too. So we had to pick out books for each child, all while Cole FREAKED OUT if one person wasn't in his line of sight. Even more fun when he claimed he didn't want any books, but I knew he'd be really made when we got home if he didn't have any, so I forced him into the fact books section and chose a bunch of books about planets that he swore - loudly - up and down that he didn't want. (And which he read all afternoon.)

It was finally time to check out our books. And then Tess and Cole decided it was finally time to destroy those little rope-like thingies that show you where to stand in line. I'm usually pretty good about keeping them away from them, but Spencer and Josh fighting distracted me, and before I knew it Cole had retracted two of the sections and then I watched Tess get hit on the face by one retracting really fast and then screech about it.

The joy.

We could not get out of there fast enough.

THEN.

We had lunch. Only not all of us, because Cole was being SO VERY NAUGHTY. So very naughty that I had to remove him from the table and declare that he had to eat alone after we were all done since he didn't seem to remember how to behave while eating a meal with other people. (Read: we don't start fist fights or throw food. EVER.)

This was, of course, not very well-received from the offending party. It did not help matters at all that the other three cheered as I dragged him away.

After everyone was done eating I declared that it was basement time for the next hour at least, and that they were to all stay down there and not come up unless someone was bleeding. Profusely.

Which, to their credit, they did.

The rest of the day wasn't that bad. Just long. And there was some bleeding. (Not profuse, though.) And more time outs. And laundry to fold and jam to make and menus to plan and grocery lists to fill.

And now it's bedtime.

Hopefully the second day of summer vacation will be a little easier.