Dream House

When I was a little girl I used to dream about the big mansion I would live in when I grew up. Grand staircases, huge ballrooms, a canopy bed in the bedroom, an indoor pool with warm water and a huge water slide: you know, the usual.

Then I grew up.

Now my dream house is taking on a different kind of look. Oh, I'd like it to be bigger, but not huge. (Unless it came with a maid.) And all the frou-frou castle-like decor? Probably wouldn't look as great with permanent marker and peanut butter and jelly smeared across it. I'm just sayin'.

Nope, my dream house is definitely more mommy-oriented. Here are a few of my ideas:

Kiddo Clean-up Room
This room would be just off of the kitchen or dining room and used to clean off messy kids after meals. It would be big enough to wheel a high chair into, or at least toss 2-3 messy kids. The walls, floors, and ceiling would be tiled and there would be a hose (with warm water, of course) that you could use to wash off the messy little miscreants. The coup de tat? A garbage disposal in the middle of the floor. Think how easy it would be to clean the spaghetti or spinach off of junior! Kids love being sprayed with a hose and the garbage disposal would mean no picking off the larger chunks of food before you clean.

Okay, I guess you could have the same effect if you just put a garbage disposal in one of your tubs. But that's just not as fun.


The Dressing Room
This room would be just four blank walls, no windows, and a cement floor. That's it. In other words, NO DISTRACTIONS. I'd put my kids in there with their clothes and tell them they could come out once they were dressed. No more lolligagging for 45 minutes while you're getting 'dressed', Spencer!


Boys' Media Room
This would be down in the basement. The walls and doors would be sound proof so I wouldn't have to listen to the video games, movies, tv shows, and fighting that they seem to have to listen to/generate at FULL VOLUME. (*Side note: I was in my room, on the other side of the house, the other day and could hear Spencer's video game as if it were in the room with me. I made him turn it down to normal levels, but only after threatening to mute the volume and hide the remote if he didn't stop crying about it. Seriously, am I the only one in this house without impaired hearing?!) I don't know about the decor or what kind of media set-up they would have because I would never set foot in there; it'd be Lance's and the boys' domain. But I know it would be large enough for LAN parties, with electrical outlets spaced every six feet and gaming tables all around the perimeter.


Master Bathroom
Nothing special about this room, unless there is such a thing as a self-cleaning toilet or shower. No, what would make this special would be the waterproof video intercom in the shower. I'd lock the door and monitor the kids while relaxing in the shower. If someone came banging on the door I would be able to know whether or not it was a true emergency. (Blood/missing finger/tornado = true emergency. Wanting juice/tattling/just 'wanting mommy' = not an emergency.) Also, I'd want it equipped with a microphone (with speakers throughout the house) so that if I saw someone misbehaving I could tell them to knock it off. "Joshua Roper Madsen! I see you! Step away from the couch and put the knives back in the kitchen. NOW."


Craft Room
First, I would just love to have a craft room to myself. I kind of do now, but a certain baby boy will be taking it over come the end of May. (And that's okay.) Besides plenty of workspace and storage for all my stuff, I'd need a nice computer and printer, a TV, a mini fridge full of yummy and healthy snacks and a bed with big comfy pillows and blankets. (Because crafting can make you really sleepy!) But best of would be the security system to get into the room. We're talkin' eye scanning technology, people. (As in, the system would do a retinal scan to determine if you could come in or not.)

Yep, not just anyone could get into my room. No one under the age of 18. No one who thinks that paper is only good for ripping and throwing. No one with a face smeared with peanut butter and jelly or fingers greasy from who knows what. In fact, no one with a Y chromasome. (Sorry, Lance.) A few select friends would be invited in occasionally. But other than that - no one in but me!


Garden
My garden would be huge. And well-maintained. And beautiful. Mainly because I would have three or four gardeners to help me. :) There would be veggies and fruit trees and flowers and whatnot. But the best part would be the hammock. I've always wanted a hammock. I would go out there all the time to 'read and relax' (i.e. read 5 minutes before falling asleep). We'd have plenty of hammocks so that no one would feel the need to come jump on mine. Heaven.


Okay, those are some parts of my dream house. What are some of yours?