An actual conversation I had with Cole at bedtime tonight:
Cole: I don't want to go to bed. I keep having DREAMS!!!
Me: Bad dreams? I'm sorry, buddy, I know those are no fun.
Cole: NO. Not bad dreams. Just the same dreams. Every night!
Me: Wha...? You're having the same dreams every night?
Cole: No. I just keep dreaming. Every. Night.
Me: Cole, everyone dreams. It's part of being human.
Cole: But my dreams are so boring!
Me: Your dreams are boring. You're complaining because your dreams are boring.
Cole (exasperated): YES. So boring!
Me: Well, ah, there's not much I can do for you. I'm not in charge of dreams. Your brain is in charge of your dreams.
Cole: No! You're in charge!
Me: Of everything else, yes. Of your dreams, no.
Cole: *FRUSTRATED GROWL*
Me: Sorry, buddy.
Cole: But they are so BORING!!
Me: I can't do anything about that.
**This goes on for a good 5 minutes. It's maddening.**
Me (losing it to frustration): COLE!! Listen to me. I simply cannot do anything to change your dreams. I would if I could, but I emphatically cannot. I. Cannot. Change. Your. Dreams.
Cole (without missing a beat): Hey, I have an idea to change my dreams.
Me (sighing): What?
Cole (As if rehearsed): I could stay up later! With Spencer! That would change my dreams!
Me: Nice try, buddy boy. But staying up late will definitely not change your dreams.
Cole: *FRUSTRATED GROWL*
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